failure to succeed

Feeling of disappointment, unhappiness, less interest in life…etc are common feelings when faced with failure. Failure can be for any reason, but the result is same.

More than failure itself, on failure, the reaction of the people around us make us feel more unhappy and disappointed.

People break down emotionally, that is the point of downfall. Downfall doesn’t start with failure but it starts with emotional breakdown.

It is not difficult to see people who are crying. but it is very difficult to see people who are crying inside by themselves. As a matter of fact people who don’t express their bitter feeling inside to others are only more.  Its because of social psyche…If a person cries in front of others he is considered week. Society says …A real man doesn’t cry …he faces situation….etc etc.. But the same society doesn’t understand that at the time of grief …the person doesn’t require any lecture about being man or lecture on how to overcome difficulty or how to face situation. All that the person needs is a shoulder to cry, few kind words, an environment where he doesn’t have to worry what society thinks… A secure place, a secure arm with whose help he can get back on his foot.

When we see our closed ones being unhappy, we may also get emotional, break down and join him/her on the same boat…but we fail to ask our self at that time what am i doing is right ? …. The person in grief surely doesn’t want others too to join on his same boat of feeling of grief, pain, unhappiness… His emotions goes more severe and his pain only amplifies.

Life seems meaningless when struck with unhappiness. But seems too meaningful when being in happiness. Person feels he wants to be left all alone when in pain but longs for company of many when in happiness… At times it seems as though one is north pole and other is south pole… I guess that’s why people say ..you have to have balanced emotions… I wish it was easy to be that way as it is so easy to hear and say to others.

For a dejected, unhappy person he cannot see the road to happiness and he gets more unhappy not being able to find the road. He looses himself more in the search of that road and in the fear of failing to find that road of happiness too…

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10 Habbits of unhappy people

Ego says, ‘Once everything falls into place, I’ll feel peace.’ Spirit says, ‘Find your peace, and then everything will fall into place.’” ~Marianne Williamson

Have you ever felt that something was missing in your life?

Who am I kidding, everyone has.

I used to be unhappy. But not just unhappy—miserable.

I’d look at other people and wonder what they had that I didn’t. I was sick of living my life. And being sick of it was the tipping point that changed it all. It’s what got me moving in the direction of what made my heart sing.

As I moved forward, I discovered that what was making me miserable wasn’t outside of me, but the habits I had built up over the years.

I’d like to share with you what those habits were, and how I overcame them.

1. Waiting for clarity.

I thought that in order to do what I loved and be happy, I had to know where I was going.

Turns out that was a mirage. It was a thought that I believed.

When I took action despite feeling confused, and simply did my best, I discovered that I could always take one step forward, clarity or no clarity.

It was like walking in a heavy fog. As long as I kept moving forward, more of my path revealed itself. But if I stood still, nothing would happen.

Fix: Don’t wait for clarity. Listen to your heart, and take one tiny step forward. It doesn’t have to be perfect.

2. Seeking permission from others.

I wanted others to tell me I was on the right track. The more I did this, the emptier I felt inside.

Why? Because I was giving my power away. Instead of listening to my own guidance system, I was relying on someone else.

It was confusing and disempowering.

I’ve never had an easy time just trusting life. I worry a lot. But over the years, I’ve realized that trusting myself is the only way toward living a fulfilling life.

Once I stopped trying to seek permission, or figure things out, my inner wisdom grew stronger, because it was no longer clouded by thoughts.

Fix: Don’t look to someone else for validation for your dreams. Go after what makes you come alive. That’s enough.

3. Hoping for future salvation.

Another unhelpful habit I have is living in the future, thinking that reaching my goals will make me happier.

However, I’ve noticed that once again, this is just a thought that I give power to.

I’ve also noticed that I’ve reached plenty of goals that I thought would make me happy, but didn’t.

Like me, you’ve probably heard the following phrase over and over again: “Happiness comes from the inside. It’s available right here, right now.”

For a long time, I wondered, “That’s all fine and good, but how do I use that in my life?”

The answer was to witness my thoughts, and let them pass by. I don’t have to believe in every thought that tells me that the future holds the key to my happiness.

Once I let those thoughts pass, I notice that there’s a source of joy within, always available to me.

Fix: When you find yourself living in the future, just notice what you’re doing. Let go of the tendency and observe what’s going on. This is a practice, so don’t worry if you don’t get it perfect.

4. Wanting to take big leaps.

When I get caught up in thinking that the future will save me, I want to take big leaps. I want to hurry to my goal.

Yet this behavior makes reaching my goal less likely. It introduces sloppiness into my work. It produces an aroma of selfishness.

But, if I let things take their time, and if I let those thoughts pass, there’s a sense of peace.

As I write this, I’m not in a hurry. I sense the wanting to finish, but I witness it. I don’t get involved. Then I return my focus to writing, and letting the words flow on paper.

And my soul smiles. My heart nods. My breath deepens.

I remember: “This is it. This is life.”

Fix: Big leaps assume that happiness is in the future. Take a deep breath. Notice how much happiness is available right now. No big leaps needed, just a remembering of who you are.

SOURCE: http://goweloveit.info/lifestyle/10-habits-of-unhappy-people-and-how-to-fix-them/#XEjiOw801QBRgQHC.99

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Movie Release

Sometimes we wait for many days anticipating for a release of a movie. It may be a sequel of a movie we wish to see or a movie from a favorite actor/actress or a movie made by favorite director or it may be a movie much hyped about in the media.

If we are very eager to see that movie we wont mind doing an advanced ticket booking  by paying a higher cost to see it on first day. Watching a move on first day – first show is by itself a thrilling experience, Watching it on the day of release has always been something special in our heart.

Different regions of the world shows  different ways of  celebrations of a release of a new movie.

In South India, fans celebrate the release of most movies by offering a holy bath in milk to the actor’s posters in front of the movie theaters, combined with bursting of crackers and garlanding the actor’s poster. Fans also try to duplicate the looks of their favorite actor by dressing up just the way the actors do.

In North India in some places it is observed that fans celebrate the release of a movie by throwing colors at each other and distributing sweets in theaters. Just like in South India huge cutouts of actors and actresses is also common.

In most parts of the world movie releases are accompanied by special screening of movie premieres and cocktail parties being organised.

Hollywood Red Carpet Events

Some movie releases end up in controversies, like the recent one- THE INTERVIEW .

Quote – The North Korean government has promised a “merciless” retaliation against the United States if The Interview is released, calling the film an “act of war.” In a statement published by the state-run KCNA news agency, a spokesman said the film is the work of “gangster moviemakers” and is a “wanton act of terror.” “The act of making and screening such a movie that portrays an attack on our top leadership… is a most wanton act of terror and act of war, and is absolutely intolerable,” the spokesman said, according to AFP. Unquote.

 

 

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What makes your life awesome??

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listening to music in night

 

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i believe true music always touches your heart….but it finds a shortcut especially in night. In night we experience calmness in environment, we can feel the silence all around… the calm breeze that soothens not just your body but your mind. Night is the time when u feel u are not in stress/anxiety and can actually enjoy music at its every beat. I even feel that even the lyrics touches your heart in night… 

People working in BPOs (Business processing outsourcing) or can be that of any job like that of a driver driving in night or an aircraft technician working in night  or a construction worker or a railway guard or a night watchman…be it anyone who works in night shift would have definitely experienced the pleasure music offers when listened to it in the calmness of night. 

The same music may offer huge difference in its intensity at which it touches your heart and the feelings it brings out in a person when heard in day or at night . The effect varies between day and night. It also offers an amazing effect when you are listening alone as compared to listening with a group of people. 

Music is nasha (sweet intoxication), it can be a companion for the lovely,at the same time happiness multiplier when u are with your group of friends. It can even make a crying baby to stop crying and doze off to sweet dreams. It can even inspire a person to write an article 😉 Music can bring hearts closer, it can create the ambience,and also create relationships. 

Music offers varied experience at varied time of the day and at varied climatic conditions and in varied situations. 

In short ,sometimes the feeling it offers is very tough to put it in words. Hence enjoy the music..listen to it whenever you feel you want to be happy. Live life filled with music. 🙂  Music is not just for the heart its for the soul too 😉

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Story of a studious boy – Cupcake.

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“All work and no play doesn’t just make Jill and Jack dull, it kills the potential of discovery, mastery, and openness to change and flexibility and it hinders innovation and invention.” said Joline Godfrey.  I am about to narrate the story of a boy who was just like jack, who didn’t play enough in his childhood, who was chubby and fat all through his life as he remembers, who was a charming kid in his childhood but went on to become a lazy, low on confidence indecissive person in the his early youth and his life changing journey in graduation that changed him completely as a person.

Alfred who is now in his youth was once a school going boy, in his childhood he was a innoscent, most charming student in school. He was an average student in studies but bright in other oratory extra curricular activities like quiz, debate, pick and speak and turn the coat event. His friends would look at him in jealousy at his extra ordinary oratory skills.  He had such good oratory skills that once his teacher told him that he shall go on to become a great politician in his life. Wondering where did he get such good oratory skills…? It was his father who used to tune in his television set only to news, debate and other current affairs program. Like alfred his father too was addicted only to current affairs program on TV.

In his childhood , Alfred looked like a beautiful cup cake, baked brightly colored and swollen round. He was fat. Its easy to guess what was the reason behind his looks like that of a cupcake. He was one spoilt kid who never had friends near home to play and hence TV was his only friend. Unlike other kids he never read comic books too, his parents never used to read any books to put him to bed. They used to just feed him so much that he used to go on to sleep on his own lazily because of stuffing his body with too much food. So making him sleep was never a problem to his parents and hence they didn’t find the need to read bed time stories for Alfred to make him sleep. This resulted in getting him baked round like a beautiful cup cake. Parents always thought that their son looks so healthy. They never thought that he was fat. Their love blindfolded them with reality. Little they knew that their son never played any outdoor games in school because other kids used to tease him for being a cupcake and would never let him play with them. Alfred grew up without playing in outdoor like other kids. Parents never realised Alfred’s problem because Alfred always used to win prizes in oratory events in school. And they thought that their son is doing wonderful in school as he wins many prizes and fares quite well in his studies. They never realised that their son is not playing any outdoor games.

After completing his schooling Alfred went on to study in college. He joined such a college that none knew its name. His college was more like a public park than an educational institution. Lecturers never cared which student attended the class and who didn’t. Students used to come and go like a public park.  Classes were filled with students that it looked like a circus, students looked like spectators and lecturer was like a joker who played to the tunes of the spectators to keep them happy. Alfred’s parents knew little of this. They enrolled him to this college thinking its a very noble educational institution and his son would benefit greatly in this college. They were despised with the number of years of existence of  that college. College had only grown old, neither their management nor the ranking of college grew for providing the quality education. This old college had many new lecturers and very few old lecturers, new lecturers with very little teaching experience and old lecturers with lots of ego and pride and with very less to teach. New lecturers tried to teach bits and pieces and old lecturers taught very less expecting new lecturers to teach everything. Old lecturers wanted to be in comfort for gaining so many years of teaching experience. Amidst all this drama Alfred completed his 11th and 12 th class with average marks. He managed to score a first class with the help of private tuitions he received. In his two years of college the same trend continued, he never played outdoor. College didn’t even had a playing ground, that was another major reason why college never organised games for their students. College rarely used to organise oratory competitions and Alfred continued to win in those events. Like always he managed to convince his parents that he was doing good in his college and life. But in reality he was the same, Jack who never played and was becoming lazy day by day and without games his personality too got affected. By the end of college Alfred never realised the importance of competing or winning. He never knew what’s a true sportsman ship. i.e to take both winning and loosing equally. Alfred grew up as a shy boy, a boy who never realised the value of playing as a team, a boy who preferred to be by himself than to mix with other people and be a team player. He was feeling like a one man army all the time.

Alfred went on to pursue his graduation. It was an experience that would make him introspect on many things happening in his life. By his good luck or god’s grace he got into a prestigious college and fared really good in the college. The college had stood up to its reputation. It was one of the most famous and prestigious college in the city. The college was known for its extra curricular activities and the importance they give for all round development of the students. The college was also known for excellent academic performance apart from their excellence in sports, The college used to organise regularly outdoor activities like games, sports meet, village exposure camps…etc. The graduation college was a life changing experience for Alfred. It made him realise the value of extra curricular activities. It made him think that by working as team he can benefit to a greater extent. Most importantly he needs to change his cupcake image. He realised the importance of working on his personality both physical and intellectually.

 

Now the question is how many get the opportunity to get such good college. Imagine what would have happened to Alfred if he had not been to that college. He would have turned himself to an introvert, a shy person, a person with no confidence, a failure. It is very important for parents to keep a track of their children. They should go deep into the lives of their children and understand what is he/she going through.  First parents need to understand the importance of extra curricular activities and how it helps in shaping personalities of their children. Students should branch out from the sole academics and should involve in extracurricular activities too, which will help them spill out the charismatic personality in them, make them a leader than a follower, imbibe in them team building spirit, enhance self esteem and prepare them to face the challenges the world has to offer them in their success journey.

 

Its not just the story of Alfred, but there are millions of children who may be facing these problems. It is upto us to work towards a society that is sensitive towards these issues and help build  great personalities. All of this can happen when parents take a little more interest and try to understand what their children is doing and what is happening in their life. Educational institutions should look into all these issues in greater detail. Government education authorities should make sure that condusive enviornment is there in schools and colleges. All of this can happen when there exists greater awareness on this and I hope this story may create awareness to few atleast if not many.

 

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Why people feel like commiting suicide…?

This is a general article, not taking into account anything about psychological problems… 

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People feel like commiting suicide when they feel so heavy in heart that they fail to see a happy world out there,  when they feel no purpose of life, when they feel they dont have anyone in life with whom they can share problems…with whom they can talk about their tears in their eyes. they cannot talk because they they feel they have failed their loved ones..they feel they have failed in their duties to take care of loved ones more than the failure. 

 

People can commit suicide for many reasons. Financial difficulties, love failure, relationship conflicts, ….etc but the common element in all of that is failure. It can be failure to have a stable financial position or failure of marriage or failure of keeping the loved ones happy. When failure takes over people feel heavy hearted,eyes wet in tears, emotions so heavy that they wont be even able to cry whole heartedly  they wont be able to express themselves to anyone or comprehend any situation. Most people commit suicide not because they are not able to cry and make their heart light. 

 

Whenever u get an opportunity to talk to people who are dejected in life….who are facing failures…TALK….Please talk to them…make them feel that they have a reason to live …which is beyond success and failures. Success and failures are not permanent. Situations change…Just as they are facing failure they may see success too . 

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